In my heyday of clients and billings, my largest client asked me to handle an outsourcing transaction. I would hazard a guess that had it been completed, it would have made quite a ripple in the business community.
A Bay Street firm was the client’s corporate counsel. The client may have been my biggest client, but we handled only a sliver of their legal work.
Let’s talk about deadlines. Here are two quotes to get us started:
From Douglas Adams, we give you the light-hearted Associate’s perspective: “I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.”
Don’t let that lull you into a false sense of security, because the truth comes from Amit Kalantri, who said: “A professional who doesn’t deliver as committed is not just lazy, he is a liar.”
Early in my articles, a senior partner named David asked me to draft a document and gave me a precedent to use. David approved my draft but asked me to show it to Bob, a more junior partner. Bob told me that I had left out an important clause and asked me if David had approved my drafting. When I assured him that David had thought the draft was fine, Bob rolled his eyes and I understood that Bob did not hold David in high regard.
People of my vintage remember playing musical chairs at birthday parties, back before the days when money was so plentiful that it seemed to be important to impress the neighbours by hiring clowns and musicians or renting bouncy castles to entertain five-year-olds.
For those of you who did not have the pleasure of being pushed off of a chair by some mean kid who had fifty pounds on you, the idea was that music would be played while the children would circle a number of chairs that was always one fewer than the number of kids marching around them.
I came across a lawyer the other day who makes mistakes in his communications with clients and the other side. None of the errors will likely land him in too much trouble. They may even be excusable based on the theory that spending too much time trying to be ‘perfect’ is unhealthy and expensive for clients who are being billed based on the amount of time spent on the matter. But they are mistakes nonetheless, and they could all be caught with a bit more thought and proof-reading.
This morning someone remarked that much of my writing about the legal profession is a tad negative. She said, “you practiced law for a long time; you were good at what you did; you made enough money to retire and travel the world. Surely you must have liked something about being a lawyer, didn’t you?”
Susan and Bob are unhappy spouses who own and operate a business. Sue enacts some resolutions to remove her husband as a director and officer of the corporation. Then she goes to the office before business hours, changes the locks, tells Bob that he is fired, and hires a security guard.
Bob shows up for work and is refused entry. He calls the police. The cops come and tell him that they are just there to keep the peace, which they will do by preserving the status quo. Since Sue is on the inside, she gets to stay there. As Bob is on the outside, he has to stay there.
Adapt or perish, now as ever, is nature’s inexorable imperative.” – H. G. Wells
I can mount a persuasive argument that I had a successful career practicing law.
Although it is unlikely that in a hundred years anyone will be writing about my contributions to the Law, some of my clients likely have fond memories about how I provided sound advice, got them out of a jam, or helped them achieve their goals.
When asked about my complaints about the legal profession, I am forced to admit that back before I escaped the profession and became happy, I did in fact have some good days. Three of them. (Okay, I am kidding about that last bit. There were more good days than that.)
My father told me about a dad who told his son to jump from a roof top, and that he would catch him. The son jumped. The dad stepped aside and let him fall. When the injured boy demanded an explanation, the dad replied, “I have just taught you a valuable lesson. Never trust anyone, not even your own father.”
As you may imagine, I had trust issues growing up, which is a bad thing. As it turns out, having a few trust issues may be helpful in the business world.